Potterpuffs: Ravenclaw

Ravenclaw: We're smarter and stranger than you are

Methods be damned; I just want to be the smartest

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Lancing A Boil - Asian F
Potterpuffs: Ravenclaw
amylan


Quick montage of the kids going through Booty Camp practice. Mercedes comes in late and explains that she overslept by thirty minutes, so her whole schedule shifted around, which is why she's late when it's 4:30 PM. Mike helps Mercedes catch up, but when she spins, she immediately runs to the trash can and pleads off on nausea. Santana basically calls her a wimp and says the reason Mercedes is sick is because she ate right before coming to practice, pointing out that she could eat at the same time as everyone else and solve that problem (and yes, Santana is back because she apologized behind Sue's back). Mercedes thinks Will has them overscheduled, but Will tells them all that they need to do better than their best right now. Title card!

Will and Emma's apartment. Will confronts Emma over some hidden wedding magazines he found in the pantry, and what the fuck? They've been dating for a few months! But possibly this is a long-standing thing since before Will. Anyway, he wants to be absolutely honest, so he shares his secret porn stash with Emma, and then asks why he hasn't met her parents. Emma's response of having ghost parents and such makes it very clearly that she finds them embarrassing, and she makes an excuse to run off.

Figgy's office. Mike's dad is upset because Mike got an A- on a chemistry test (the Asian F of the title) and thinks that Mike is either on drugs, being distracting by his girlfriend, or overworked by his schedule. Figgy is all for getting rid of Tina because she's still been terrifying him about being a vampire, but Mr. Chang, Sr., would rather Mike quit Glee because it doesn't add to his transcript. Mike pleads for a second chance and offers to pay for a chemistry tutor.

Locker room. Beiste gives a briefing to the football players about why she's on crutches (she got upset about Ace of Cakes being canceled), a staph infection going around, and how everyone in the football team has to audition for West Side Story as dancers unless specifically excused (like Finn, who has auto shop after school). The football players bitch about having to learn to dance, and it's then that Mike, who's been in his head this whole time, noticing everyone staring at him.

Cafeteria. Mercedes's boyfriend, Shane, sees her making up with Rachel and asks what's going on. When she explains that she and Rachel made nice about competing, Shane thinks it's stupid and that she needs to be more cutthroat and brutal. Shane is an asshole. He convinces her that she needs to be like Beyonce in Dreamgirls, though that I'd like to point out that Beyonce's is a star in Dreamgirls because she was more marketable, not more talented. Mercedes' thinks it's sweet though, and sings "Spotlight" while stalking around Rachel and then as her audition piece. The judges are impressed, Shane is happy, and Rachel starts having a meltdown.

Hallways. We learn that Tina's been helping Mike practice singing to audition for Riff, but Mike is backing out. He explains all the scheduling pressure he's under and how his dad is flipping out over the A-. Tina thinks he should be honest with his dad about his dreams, but gets his point when he brings up how honesty about her stuttering bit her in the ass.

Elsewhere, Rachel is helping Kurt try to pass out campaign buttons. Kurt is fairly optimistic about his chances of winning class prez, given Brittany usual personality, but she and Santana waltz up and the whole thing turns into this weirdly intellectual commentary on feminism triumphing over the patriarchy or something. In any case, the thing culminates in a flash dance of "(Girls) Run The World" in the gym. Brittany is definitely going to be getting a lot of votes. And Kurt starts having a meltdown.

Teacher's lounge. Beiste and Emma still can't decide between Rachel and Mercedes. Will drops in and they fill him in on events. Overall, while they consider Rachel to be the secure choice, they do think that Mercedes has the chance to blow her out of the water. Will is proud of Mercedes' progress and credits it to pushing her in Booty Camp. The judges come to a conclusion…
…Which is to have a callback for Rachel and Mercedes. They inform the two in Emma's office and Mercedes is enraged because she has no idea how show business works. Rachel thinks it's because she's so good they can't just give her the part, and tells the judges she's going to sing "I Feel Pretty." Because they don't want to have that song on the show again, Emma explains that they're going to sing "Out Here On My Own" instead. Once the two leave the office, Rachel patronizingly (but it's still an improvement for her) tries to congratulate Mercedes on her callback. Mercedes snottily tells her to wait until she's won the part to congratulate her. Time for that meltdown to get even worse.

Hallways, after school. Mike is anxiously assuring his father that he's going to go meet the tutor right away and apologize for letting him down. In the process of leaving, though, he spies the school's ballet room. An apparition of his father tries to talk sense into him, telling him that dancing is an unstable career choice, but Mike dances away from it and is assured by an apparition of Tina that he should be true to himself and that's what makes her love him.

Auditorium. The judges call out for Mike Chang, but he doesn't show up. They move on to the next auditionee, only for Mike to show up after all, apologizing for being late. The judges are surprised that he's auditioning for Riff, since it involves singing, but Mike is freaking awesome. And he has some of the football players dance with him as the rest of the Jets, fulfilling Beiste's requirement. The judges are duly impressed with his efforts, but wonder if it'll be a waste of his time. Mike assures them that doing something he loves will never be a waste of time.

Teacher's lounge. Shelby mopes to Beiste that no one's joining her glee club, but Beiste is firmly on Will's side and is unsympathetic. Shelby leaves and Will takes her place. Beiste explains that she's eating pasta because she needs the energy for all the after-school activities she ahs to take care of, then compliments Emma on being such a hard worker and tells Will to be proud of her. Will feels that Emma isn't proud of him because she hasn't introduced him to her parents, but Beiste talks him up and tells him to go and introduce himself.

Outdoors staircase. Blaine, why do you continue to wear bowties and Kurt, why do you look like you just walked out of the Civil War? Kurt takes the opportunity to congratulate Blaine because he nailed his audition, and he gives him a bouquet of roses. Blaine is pleased that Kurt is taking this so well, I'm pleased with Kurt's character development, and the two walk off together.

Auditorium. Will tells the Booty Camp members that he's been impressed by how far they've come, but is confused why Brittany is there. It's because she's going to dance for her presidency or something. He and Mike have the kids run through one of the dance moves, and the kids correctly complete it until the only one struggling is Mercedes, who is still complaining and, since she deflects when Will asks, probably didn't practice either (which meshes with her audition last season). Mercedes finally blows up and blames Will for holding her back and favoring Rachel, who doesn't go to Booty Camp—though, as Finn points out, Rachel practices every night on her own. While Mercedes does have some points about favoring Rachel and giving her all the solos and such, it's worth pointing out that Rachel expects to get roles both because she has the talent and because she does the work necessary, while Mercedes tends to come off as more entitled and spoiled here. It's just cemented when Will gives her an ultimatum: if she walks off, she's off Glee, and it leads into "It's All Over" from Dreamgirls. Which, in context, was Effie being correctly aggrieved that she doesn't get more chances for attention but comes out saying that she's suffering SO MUCH and they're all SO MEAN to her, while the others pointed out that she's not the only one suffering. It sort of matches what the episode is saying, I'm just not sure that's what Mercedes intended.

Dance room. Mike is practicing dance moves when his mother catches him. She tells him she knows he skipped the tutoring session, then asks for an explanation. He tells her that his dream is to be a dancer. Mrs. Chang fully supports her son's auditioning, and tells him that if he lands the part, they'll tell his father together. It turns out that her dream was to be a dancer too, but her father didn't let her. Mike gives her a little impromptu ballroom dance lesson. Relevant to this scene, Mrs. Chang is played by Tamlyn Tomita, who also played Kumiko, an aspiring dancer, in Karate Kid Part II.

Auditorium. Mercedes and Rachel are talked up by their respective boyfriends. Rachel wins the coin toss and, naturally, elects to go second. Mercedes ends up doing a terrific job with the song, however, and Rachel acknowledges that she's the better singer.

The next day, Rachel marches down to the locker rooms to discuss something with Coach Beiste.

Time for the first medical sidebar of the season! At their apartment, Emma finds candles lit in the dining room. It turns out that Will has invited Emma's parents over because he still thinks she's ashamed of him. However, she's really ashamed of her parents, who are ginger supremacists, and I literally had to turn the sound off because the logic fail hurt me. To sum up: Emma's parents believe that redheads are an endangered species of the population, and their habits of cleaning any "taint" from non-redheads are implied to be the reason for Emma's OCD, which they belittle her for and call her a freak. Sidebar: No, redheads are not disappearing from the population. While red hair is a recessive trait, redheads breeding with any other hair color isn't any more likely to wipe them out than Type-O blood is likely to disappear. The red-headed genes will still be carried on to resurface later, and because redheads are thought by some to be more desirable in a mate, sexual selection is likely to continue to carry on the red-haired genes anyway. False reports of redheads disappearing came from a "foundation" funded by a hair-dye company and were found to be shoddy. This message is brought to you by Wikipedia and my genetics class. Anyway, Will calls the parents out on their terrible treatment of Emma and their racism.

Hallways. Kurt calls Rachel out on running for senior class president. Rachel tells him it's her failsafe to improve her transcript, and they wouldn't be having this problem if they had been working on extracurriculars during all of high school—but anyway. Rachel will make Kurt her vice prez if she wins and wants him to do the same, but because Kurt is planning to do this to help the "freaks" in the school, he tells her he's going to win no matter what, and how she treats her friends in high school is going to stick with her in the future. Kurt, please, take off that hat.

Emma's office. The judges have made their decision and they're going to extend West Side Story's run by a week and double-cast Maria so they can give both girls four evening shows and two mats. Rachel happily accepts this, but Mercedes is pissed because they all know she did better at the song. On the other hand, singing isn't everything in show business—you also have to be willing to do the work, and that might be why they couldn't decide between the two. Mercedes declines the role, which automatically goes to Rachel.

Hallways. Rachel tells Finn what happened and he thinks she'll give up on running now, but Rachel now thinks that she might be able to improve things as a female candidate, just like Brittany said. Rachel asks who Finn is going to vote for and he doesn't know.

Apartment. Emma's seriously regressing into her OCD. Will tries to get her to stop, but it doesn't work and she ends up on her knees and praying to God. Will joins her, and it leads to a rendition of "Fix You" from Coldplay, which is… okay, I guess? It's painful to watch Emma breaking down and Will wanting to help, but the montage is helped a bit by intercuts of the cast list for WSS. Mike got Riff, which leaves him and Tina overjoyed. Brittany and Santana celebrate Santana's casting as Anita, which has to be the most perfect thing ever; Blaine pretty much glomps Kurt while Kurt seems vaguely horrified that he was stuck as Officer Krupke. Rachel looks guilty as Mercedes walks past, and Mercedes joins Shelby's show choir.


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